His Love Transforms!!

For about a year and a half I believe I have been experiencing a great struggle in my walk with God. There were so many issues going on in my life that I had once been extremely passionate about the Lord sorting out. When I just became I Christian, I just KNEW He was able to deal with all the various stuff going on in my life at that time. However, as time progressed and it began to seem like many of the things I wanted Him to do weren't happening, disappointment began to seep in and ultimately lack of faith. I didn't realize it at first because of the way it took a somewhat godly form. I began to just question a lot of things. When I heard of tragic situations, I would think stuff like "Yeah, God CAN do anything, but will He?". I moved from a place of having faith no matter the matter to lacking faith for almost every matter.

Just last week I was telling my best friend what I had been going through and how I wasn't really expecting an upcoming UCCF camp to do much about it. However, I prayed that God would have His way and do what He willed at this camp, the theme of which was "His LOVE Transforms". I was asked to do an item that somehow depicted this theme. Initially, I was like thinking that I was in no position to say or sing anything about a transforming love. Nevertheless, God told me to write a poem about what was going on with me and that He would give me a melody after and He did! Thankfully, people were ministered to and I was certain it had nothing to do with me.

Since the title of this blog sounds so positive, obviously the camp was awesome!! Or rather God IS awesome and definitely displayed His awesomeness on this camp! The interesting thing is that I cannot pinpoint ONE particular experience that did it for me. It was just a potpourri of things that all came together and showed me that through His love I could be different. The hurting side of me was healed, the doubtful side was inspired to believe, the lazy side became determined, the fickle side became disciplined, the bitter side has forgiven, the frustrated side was granted peace and the insecure side IS becoming confident in Him! The only thing I kinda regret is being somewhat anti-social with people I didn't know very well which God eventually revealed to me was linked to me not trusting others easily. He's still working on me with that =D.

I know without a doubt that God's purpose for my life must be established and I am totally ready to do whatever He asks of me. The very thing He requests, He will enable me to do. He loved me enough to die for me and He loves me enough to transform me. Oh so grateful I am!! I wanna jump and shout and spin and dance like crazy. And even in the times I don't feel like this, I just wanna remember that the Lord my God changeth not and so my stance ought not to change either.

THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!